Breaks up are constantly hard because you have to forget somebody you loved and lost.
However, time heals everything, and eventually, you’ll meet another person. Eventually, that former lover will become a distant memory.
But, this sort of breakup is not the exact same. This breakup happened with a person who, no matter what you do, you can not get over.
Not a day goes by that this person doesn’t cross your mind and your heart feels heavy.
It’s typically because the relationship is incomplete. But, you can’t tell yourself that, and you certainly can’t believe it because it will literally drive you mad.
So instead, you tell yourself you are fine, and that you can move on. You get pretty close to fooling yourself.
That is, until you hear that tune, see that photo, yearn to share something or get up in the morning thinking of them.
Then you are right back to square one.
There are so many people who come in and out of your life. Some you date briefly and never give a second thought to, and some you like a lot, but it doesn’t work out.
Then, there are some who crush you, who take months to get over.
However this is different; this is the emotion you get when you know something has to end today but isn’t really over for good.
You can’t simply say, “I wish you the best” and move on. You cannot end that chapter due to the fact that you understand you can’t quit them. Not yet, and perhaps never.
Then, you are thrust into what I like to call “love purgatory.”
It’s a place where you know who the love of your life is, however you aren’t currently together.
Maybe you dated briefly, maybe you had a full-fledged relationship or maybe, you have actually never been officially together.
The connection with this person is so real and strong and magnetic that you are continuously pulled back. The relationship hasn’t reached its potential yet, so it can’t be over.
In fact, this might be the person you end up with. However, you aren’t together now because of timing, schedules, missed out opportunities or blah, blah, blah.
So, you sit in love purgatory, simply biding your time up until you can both find each other again.
You don’t just sit around and listen to sad music and wait though.
You find distractions and push away what you feel in order to be a sane enough human being to function in life.
You meet other amazing, beautiful people with whom you wish to work things out, but it never ever happens since something is off. He or she simply isn’t _____ (fill in the blank with your person).
” She’s not Rachel,” is the popular line from “Friends.”.
Although, it actually went more like, “She’s not Rachem,” for laughs. And, that is what this person, who has kept you in love purgatory, makes you feel; no one can ever compare.
Since when you know, you understand. That connection happens once, or maybe twice, in a lifetime.
Your pals think you’re insane, and you yourself feel crazy. Why, in a world full of billions of other people, are you permitting one to keep holding you back. You can’t find the answer for that question.
“The heart has its reasons of which reason knows nothing.” — Blaise Pascal
Some people meet someone, date, fall in love and live gladly ever after.
Numerous others are not so lucky.Some of us have to fight, breakup, makeup and go through hell with our person until it finally works out.
Possibly the issue is, once again, timing. Possibly you have to find out and grow more before you can settle down.
Whatever the issue is, you know that ultimately, the 2 er once again.of you will discover each oth
Because like Ross and Rachel, Carrie and Mr. Big, Allie and Noah and all the great romance stories from movies and television, there are simply some people who you cannot let go of and never ever will.
However, until you find your way back, you miserably sit in love purgatory, hoping to discover somebody or something to keep you occupied long enough to not self-destruct.
Some people will be outraged about this and think, “This is not how love is supposed to be,” or, “If you were more mature about love it wouldn’t be this hard.”.
However I plead to disagree, and would counter with, “How do you know?” Just because things were easy for you does not mean they will be easier for everybody else.
People are very complicated and love is often very messy.
If it’s not that way for you, it does not guarantee it’s wrong. It just means your path was easier.
For those of us currently in love purgatory, we will one day be with our soulmate, too.